I borrowed the following from a man who has been sending out love to everyone for a long time. His blog is called "The Daily Love" and his name is Masten Kipp.
"The joy that comes from realizing that suffering in our lives comes from the meaning we have given it is unlimited.
I
am not saying that painful things in your past didn't happen, but what I
am saying is that they no longer have to be painful. And it's not as
easy as changing your mind once or twice. It takes work, and reps, like
in the gym. But if you try and try enough over time, new life and new
meaning can emerge.
One of the best ways I know how to do
this is to take ourselves out of our own story and step into the
thoughts, feelings and beliefs of the person who hurt us. Not so we can
make right what they did, but so we can begin to understand the painful
event from their point of view.
As I have guided clients
through this process, the outcomes have been amazing. Forgiveness on a
whole new level of themselves and others. And from VERY traumatic
events.
The point of forgiveness is not to make right what
happened, but to bring a new sense of empathy and compassion to all
involved - this includes you.
The best way to get back at
people who have hurt us is to forgive them, because that is how we break
the bond over the painful event. And from there, when we step into
their shoes and consider how they must have been thinking and feeling,
we begin to understand that their actions were not truly against us, but
a request for Love or Significance in a very messed up way; that was
the best way that they knew how to at that time.
And from a
SOUL perspective, we can claim ownership over the meaning we give that
event, and no longer make it about how it hurt us, but about how they
were hurt and our job is now to step into more Love and compassion and
empathy, for them and for us. This takes us deeper and helps to bring
clarity, resolution and forgiveness.
The words I am
writing in this blog are easy to say and hard to do. It's not as easy as
reading The Daily Love and being done with it. But my hope is that this
blog can be a beginning point for you to start the journey of
forgiveness, of empathy and of compassion, so that one day soon you will
be set free of the chains that bind you from the past.
When
we see things from the point of view of others, we realize that what
they are doing as not against us, but as an action to make up for the
Love they didn't get. It's that simple. And in this realization, we can
transcend the hurt and the pain because we realize it was never about us
in the first place, and so the victim story can be replaced with the
story of the hero who overcame the darkness in another with Love."
I love what Masten says here. I believe that there is unbelievable healing in forgiveness. Forgiving someone can take years of burden off your shoulders...not to mention your soul. It restores relationships, enables new beginnings and allows us to move on to better things. ~ Cathy
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Thank you for commenting on my blog. I appreciate the time you took to read it and to offer your remarks. ~Cathy